Every year or so, I go through my Facebook “friend” list and make adjustments. As I scan through the list I think about each person, their relationship to me and how much time and effort I and they put into remaining connected. If there isn’t any significant contact, I will “adjust” my list.

Have you ever been “unfriended” on social media? When that happens, we wonder: Was it something I said? Maybe I post too many photos of my adorable grand kids. Was it all those cute animal videos? Too many angry political rants? The fact is, we get tired of seeing them, don’t we? I love cute animal videos but…

Seriously, there are few things in life more important than good friends. We were made for friendship, even though it has taken on a skewed meaning in our social-media culture. I don’t know how many Facebook friends you have, but I doubt they can all be the kind of friend the Bible portrays.

Burger King ran an ad campaign years ago offering a free burger to anyone who would unfriend ten people. The idea was that you like your friends, but really love the Whopper. So if you got unfriended for a burger, the pitch was, “Wow, this burger must really be something!” According to the New York Times, the stunt worked too well. Within the first week, 233,906 friendships were terminated and Burger King was obliged to give away 23,000 Whoppers. Needless to say, they quickly discontinued the offer.

So I want to ask you, how valuable is friendship to you?

Jesus said in John 15:12-17, “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. These things I command you, so that you will love one another.”

One quality we see in this passage is how a true friend is welcomed into secret places of our heart. Incidentally, that’s one reason we can’t have that many true friends. There just isn’t enough space in our life, or time in our day, to tell everybody everything. You can’t promise to always be there for every person you know. You can’t be everyone’s best friend (no duh), but you certainly need a few good friends!

Let me give you two reasons why you need to think seriously about friendship:

Friends affect how you perceive the world. A recent study was conducted with students at the University of Virginia. Each person was given a heavy backpack and directed to the base of a steep hill. Some participants were instructed to stand next to friends during the exercise, and others to stand alone. Then each person was asked to gauge how steep the hill was. The results were really interesting. The students with a friend next to them gave lower estimates—and for long-time friends, the hill seemed even less steep. Out of all the participants, those who stood alone gauged the hill to be the steepest. Your friend’s outlook and perception of circumstances can radically shape your world.

Friends shape more than your perception of the world—your friends will shape you. Proverbs 13:20 says, “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” According to this verse, what one factor determines how your life turns out? Who you choose to walk through life with? Simply put, show me your friends and I’ll show you your future. Or as someone has said, “Your friends are your future you.”

Looking at your Facebook friends list, who are the ones you are closest to? How much of an impact do they have on your life today? Do you fellowship with them? Do you see them on a regular basis? How do they affect your relationship with God? One thing I have learned is if you’re chasing after God with all your heart, it’s likely that your closest friends are as well.

We like to think of the person we want to become—someone more loving, more forgiving. We want to be a kinder person, less selfish, a better wife, a more solid Christian. What if the solution to realize that dream was as simple as choosing the right friends? Your life right now, like it or not, is being shaped by your circle of friends. So choose wisely.

One of the most fascinating character studies in the Old Testament is to look at the influence of three men who were great friends to David, the king of Israel. They were Samuel, Jonathan, and Nathan.

Samuel was a prophet and judge in Israel. With God’s help, Samuel saw qualities in David that no one else could see. All they saw was a little shepherd boy, insignificant and unremarkable. But Samuel saw in David the heart of a great king.

Jonathan was David’s best friend. He sacrificially let go of his privilege, as heir apparent to the crown, and stepped aside. He did this so that David, his friend, would be free to realize his rightful place as the future king.

Nathan was a friend who had the hardest task of all. When David was mired in his sin with Bathsheba, Nathan came and boldly him—not to destroy him, but so that he would repent and be restored.

We all need friends with qualities like David’s friends. Friends like Samuel who help us grow up into men and women of God. Friends like Nathan who are strong enough and mature enough to tell us the truth, even when it hurts—a true friend who (as it’s been said) will “stab you in the front.” We need friendships that are built on mutual respect, love, and sacrifice. Jonathan was a friend like that.

All three of these men demonstrated qualities we find in our greatest Friend of all, our Lord and Savior Jesus. Never forget that you have the perfect Friend, who is always with you. He sees more potential in you than you could ever imagine. He will lovingly confront you when you’re blind to your own faults and sins. And best of all, He is the Friend who laid down every privilege of deity to share His kingdom and His crown with you. What a Friend we have in Jesus!